Whisper in the Wind
by Roze Hime-sama
Summary: After Tenma left him, Tsurugi has become more and more depressed, to the point that he is on the verge of ending his own life to be with Tenma. Tenma's voice guides him and helps him clean up the mess in his life, starting with another person that shares Tenma's object of affection: Shindou. (KyouTen and KyouTaku. Rated T for self-harm and depressed feelings.)


Random idea that crashed into my brain during Science lesson. Weirdly, this has nothing to do with science or school. KyouTen and KyouTaku. I don't own IE or any of its characters. Rated T for self-harm and depressed feelings.

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Whisper in the Wind

_I feel like I'm going crazy. I keep on hearing whispers. Your voice whispering to me faintly in the wind._

_Every time the wind ruffles my hair, I think of you. Your metallic blue eyes and bright, cheerful personality._

_The scene of your departure is fixed in my mind. I don't think I can ever forget it._

_You were lying on the cold pavement, pale like a fallen angel, the blood pooling around you. _

_I was watching, horrified, across the street, unable to move. Numb._

_The life taken from you because of a careless driver. Some drunken idiot maneuvering his vehicle in crazy spins along the road._

_You were just about to sprint to me once the light turned green. _

_I couldn't help you then. I was helpless. Completely helpless, as I watched with wide eyes when the car crashed into you at a high speed._

_There wasn't even time for you to cry out. You just lay there, unmoving, eyes opened in a wide daze._

_When help arrived, it was already too late. Too late. You were taken from me forever._

_I felt like screaming; crying out your name, although I know that you will never answer me, never call out my name again._

_Since you left, I've become more and more quiet. Depressed, even, as Nii-san says. The seniors, especially Kirino-san and Shindou-san, are worried about me. _

_I just can't forget you. Can't get over you._

_They say that it's a kind of obsession. I don't know anymore._

_Every day, the world looks dull and colorless to me. I hardly speak nowadays. Nothing is on my mind but you._

_Nii-san has tried taking me to see a doctor, but I keep on pushing him away._

_Tenma. What can I do to be with you again?_

_Nothing. There's nothing I can do._

_I miss you. I miss you with every fiber of my being. _

_You were annoying to me at first, getting in way of every mission the Fifth Sector sent me. But then you taught me to love soccer. You warmed my heart up, so I could become what I am today._

_Without you, I am lost. I have lost my direction of life._

_I've tried forgetting you, getting over you. Through soccer, excessive practice. Studying as hard as I can for school exams. Even asking Shindou-san to teach me to play the piano._

_Nothing works. I'm getting frustrated with myself._

_A year or two has passed. I'm starting to lose track of time. My schoolwork marks have gone down, as I hardly can muster myself to concentrate._

_I've stopped eating at meals, only dreaming and thinking of you._

_Sometimes at night, I curl up in a ball and cry, grieving for your death. How you can't enjoy the world as it is right now._

_The medicines the doctors prescribe don't work. Nothing can help me._

_If I could just be with you, for another moment… I'm sure you are the only thing that can cure me._

_So I've decided. To end it all. To join you, wherever in Heaven you are._

_I pick up the razor blade, sharp and cold. The metal glints in the moonlight, welcoming and breathtaking._

_There is a sharp tingle of pain, as I slash the blade down in a zigzag shape._

_The blood begins to flow, like it did before around you._

_I lie down on the floor, the pain overcoming all senses._

_The only thing that keeps me from stopping is you._

_The thought of being with you, finally, after our long separation, is comforting even in death._

"Kyousuke!"

_Another figment of my imagination. Your voice calling to me._

"Don't do it!"

"_No…" My mind calls out sleepily, woozily. I won't stop. This is all worth it if I can be reunited with you._

"Listen to me!"

"_There is nothing to lose."_

"There's Yuuchi-san. Your friends, Taiyou and Hakuryuu!"

"_Nii-san… I'm sorry you couldn't help me. Taiyou, Hakuryuu, bear with me, for bringing you guys so much worry and pain."_

"How about Kirino-san and the other senpais? What was all their effort for?"

"_They did so much for me. But I can't meet up to their standards."_

"You have to be considerate for the one who loves you as much as I do," reasoned Tenma's voice, sadly.

"_Who? Who else, beside you? I've never fallen in love with another person before other than you."_

"I'll just have to show you. I'll lead him to you."

_No! I won't-don't have to be loved! You are enough…_

"Stop with your obsession of me… You're ruining yourself."

"_I don't care. I'm a goner. There is nothing left to do."_

"You'll see. I'll show you."

_There is a blur of color in my eyes, and I'm not in my room anymore. Although I still feel the life flowing out of my left wrist, it feels faraway and unreal._

"Look. See with your own eyes!"

_I'm at the soccer field. Then a tall navy-blue-haired boy comes into the picture._

_He is fierce-looking, sharp but bitter amber eyes, pale skin. Radiating power._

"_That's me. If that's me, then who am I? Besides, I don't look like that…"_

"You may not look like that in real life, but that's how _he _sees you."

_I walk around. I pass a pool of excess water, lying on the ground after the rain._

_Startled dark eyes stare back at me. Wavy-hair, a serious expression. Markings of a captain._

"_Shindou. No, it can't be. Shindou doesn't like me in that way!" _

"He does. That's why I'm helping him. He can help you get over me." Tenma's voice cracks at the last part.

"_I don't want to get over you!"_

"It's unhealthy. Just continue watching." Tenma says.

_I'm back in my own body. I'm walking to a huge mansion. Shindou opens the door. Only now, I can read his expression and his feelings._

_There is a flash of surprise, and shyness. He really wants to help me._

_He feels very worried and angry at himself, thinking that he should be able to do more. What will he think when he sees me in this state, with blood flowing from my self-inflicted wounds?_

_He'll blame himself. I know he will. He already takes on too much responsibility for the soccer team as captain._

"_But I'm unsure," I tell Tenma in my mind. "Unsure of my own feelings."_

"Give your love for me to him. I know you can." Tenma urges.

_I think carefully. Shindou-san always takes care of me. He always puts me before himself. His feelings run deeper than ever now that I'm depressed._

_I feel a blush surfacing on my face. If Shindou-san can take on that much for me, then… "I can try," I murmur. "But that's not a promise it will work out."_

"Don't worry! Things will always work out, somehow." Tenma says cheerily.

_I feel a sudden pull, and I'm back in my own body. The pain is more intense now, and tears are starting to flow from my eyes. _

_What if it's too late? To erase the pain I caused Shindou-san? What if he comes in and I'm already gone?_

"Hold on," whispers Tenma.

_I lie there, for what seems like a century. Suddenly, the door flies open. Shindou is standing in the doorway, a worried expression on his face._

"Tsurugi! Why… Why have you done this to yourself?" He's crying, the tears dripping from his eyes onto the floor.

_My lips start to form a reply, but I feel the darkness washing over me._

_The room grows hazy and unclear. There are blurs of shadows around me, people lifting me up, trying to move me._

_All I can see is a tearful Shindou, staring back at me, love and sadness equal in his eyes. I try to smile, my parched lips curving up unsuccessfully._

_Then the darkness takes me, and I am spiraling into nothingness, the sinister abyss of near death._

When I wake up, I'm in a white room. Shindou is still by the bed; his head slumped against his chest, hair messy and untidy.

I raise my head up to the ceiling, and down again. My left wrist is bandaged carefully, and there is a clear bag with fluid flowing into my veins through a tube.

Shindou looks up. I see the despair and anguish in his eyes.

"Why on earth…" Shindou's eyes are red from crying. "Why on earth did you do that to yourself?" He comes closer, and I see something break in his eyes, like shattered glass.

As gently as I can, I take his hand with my uninjured one. "I'm sorry," I whisper softly. "I never noticed."

Shindou-san turns his head away. The tears are rolling down his cheeks again.

I give his hand a tug, and he spins back to me. There is confusion in his expression.

"How… How did you know I was…" I hesitate slightly. "Um…"

"There was a voice." Shindou's voice is hoarse, as if he hasn't spoken for quite a while. "A voice telling me to go and find you, to save you from danger."

"Tenma," I say quietly. "Arigatou."

"Hm? Tenma?" Shindou shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

"Never mind." Slowly, I press my lips onto Shindou's mouth.

He kisses back, and at that moment, my life is filled with color again.

After a while, he pulls away, and plants a kiss on the bandage covering the zigzag wound. "I'm glad you're safe." Shindou already looks happier, a faint smile gracing his features.

I smile back, the first smile I've given in a long time. "Me too."

Somewhere, in a faraway place, a young boy is standing, alone on top of a hill.

"Mata ne, Kyousuke. Good luck with Shindou-san."

Tenma turns, smiles sadly and disappears into thin air.

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Disclaimer: Nothing in this fic reflects what I am feeling or have felt. This is all an idea that has nothing to do with my life.

Reviews, please?


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